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Chuck Zito Can Kick Your Ass!

Nunfucked: The Hidden Story of Sexual Abuse by Nuns

You Meet the Nicest People in Prison

Viagra for Masochists

Spastic Invasion

Silver Spoons and Rotten Teeth

Great Men in History Who Were Actually Born From Cross-Pollination by Bees, Part One

A Vast White-Wing Conspiracy

Short Guys Who Cast Long Shadows

Farts From Underground

Bay Aryan Resistance

A Small Sip of Success (a chapter I deleted from Shit Magnet)

Muslim Girls TURN ME ON!

In Defense of Women with Bad Teeth

Ejaculating Blood

I Always Vote for BUSH

Faking the Male Orgasm

The Sweetest Man Alive

Gay Hamburgers of Portland

Hand-Held Shower Nozzles: Demon Enemy of the Patriarchy