Gladiator school - A prison filled with muscular, violent offenders.
Kick rocks, scrub! - Fuck off, loser! Synonyms for "scrub": "lop," "lame," and "truck."
That's a cold shot - What he/they did to you was very cruel and uncaring.
You got love - Your sentence/judicial decision was light and favorable to you.
He's a solid peckerwood - That white male is a fine, dependable fellow.
Toad/bone/splib/eggplant/hammerhead/hamhock - synonyms for "Afro-American."
I got jigs - I'll watch for guards while you commit that infraction.
Rollin'! - Fuck! Here comes a guard now!
Rapo/chomo - Rapist/child molester.
Beef - A criminal charge. For instance, a "skin beef" is a sex crime, while a "bum beef" is a false charge.
Neckin' wieners/bookin' whammers - Sucking dick.
Pole-smoker/peter-puffer - Male homosexual.
Peter-gazer - One who stares at peni in the shower ù A.K.A. a pecker-checker or a shower shark.
All sucked-up - Two meanings; 1. Scrawny, as in, "I had no access to weightlifting equipment during my seven-and-a-half months in county jail; thus, I was all sucked-up when I arrived in prison." 2. Mopey and offended, as in, "Todd acted all sucked-up when Darryl made sport of him in front of other inmates."
Straight yoked - Muscular; antonym to meaning (1.) of "all sucked-up."
Freak - Specifically, a sex offender. More generally, anyone who's a little unusual and doesn't fit the convict mold. More than once while watching Seinfeld in the day room, I've heard cons comment, "That Kramer sure is a freak!"
Freak bone - A tendency toward kinkiness, usually described using a length of measurement, as in, "Perry may act like a solid, stand-up convict, but he's got a freak bone a mile long."
Inmate/convict - An inmate is helpful to guards and is genuinely thankful for this chance at rehabilitation; a convict has tattoos on his neck and chooses colorful names for himself such as "Snake" and "Jericho."
Shit - Verb which universally replaces the verb "to fart," as in, "Who shit all over themselves?"
Keister - Verb, meaning "To insert an item of contraband into one's rectum for smuggling purposes." Also known as "takin' it to the hoop" and "puttin' it in the safe."
Heart check! - I dare ya!
Starfish - One's anus.
Grille - Collectively, one's teeth, as in, "I'll punch your grille out."
Plexin' - Worrying, stressing out.
Bust a grape - Become violent.
Pressurize - Verb, meaning "to coerce."
Snipes - Soggy, unsmoked ends of hand-rolled cigarettes.
Juice card - Ability to influence events in prison, either with guards or inmates, as in, "I used my juice card to get moved to a cell in a quieter area."
I already know - A nod of assent roughly meaning "I hear you" and used with startling frequency among cons.
On my skin - A secular version of "I swear to God," usually accompanied by tapping the fingers of one hand onto the wrist of another hand. It is a prisoner's oath.
Pruno - Alcoholic beverage made from fermented chow-hall fruit, sugar, water, and yeast.
Grip - Noun, meaning "a lot," as in, "Waheed was sentenced to a grip of time."
Them - Universal replacement for "they" and "those," as in, "Them are some cool-lookin' sneakers."
Mackin' - Talking tough.
Runnin‰ your neck - Bullshitting; mackin' without anything to back it up.
Cell warrior - Someone who loudly runs his neck while safely locked in his cell but is a coward once the cell door pops open.
That's what I'M talkin' 'bout - A sort of emphatic statement somewhat equivalent to "Right on!" Black inmates often use it after a particularly spectacular slam-dunk on TV.
S.A. - Acronym for "Spanish-American" used by both S.A.s and non-S.A.s alike. Emphasis is on the "S"; it's pronounced exactly like "essay."
Grunion - A tiny amount, as in, "Hector had only a grunion of tobacco - not even enough for a cigarette."
Gettin' my {blank} on - Doing something.For instance, "Gettin' my smoke on" means "smoking," and "Gettin' my jack on" means "masturbating.
Jacket - A reputation for having a particular belief or being disposed toward a certain practice. A jacket is placed on you by others and may or may not be deserved, but once it's on you, it's hard to remove. For instance, a white male with a shaved head may have a "racist jacket," and an old man thought to be a child molester may be forced to wear a "chomo jacket."
Sancho - The man who fucks your wife or girlfriend while you're in prison.
Now what? - A taunt offered after a rhetorical comeback; it's a much more aggressive version of "the ball's now in your corner." For instance, one might say, "Oh, yeah? Well, you wuz so ugly as a kid, your parents had to tie a pork chop around your neck so the dog would play with you. Now what?"
Someone just did a drive-by - Someone silently broke wind while walking past us, leaving us to experience the after-effects.
Screamin' - Adjective used to describe a particularly delicious chow-hall item, as in, "That barbecued chicken we had for lunch was screamin'."
The fellas - The in-crowd; the group of convicts whom you can trust.
Road dog - One's best friend in prison, as well as the one on whom you could most depend for backup in a fight.
Put some water on it! - The fact that you've failed to make a courtesy flush means that an unpleasant aroma is wafting from your cell to mine, so please rectify this situation.
Dick mittens - The condition of one's hands when one neglects to wash them after urinating.
You put me on Front Street - You unintentionally ratted me out.